The Kettle Black

50 Albert Rd 

South Melbourne, VIC 3205
http://thekettleblack.com.au/

Melbourne is growing up. Though grungy is definitely still very much in, the trend seems to be slowly but surely shifting towards minimalist stylishness. As much as I’m a fan of the homely and the rustic, I have to say it is nice not to run the risk of feeling like I’m sitting in someone’s garage for brunch. 

Whilst I’ve been brunch-less for the last year, the Eggs Benedict scene has been moving forward without me. One of the most recent developments is The Kettle Black, spanning across one end of a modern apartment block through to a quaint Victorian home. The result is surprisingly harmonious, making for a uniquely chic and polished spot that have people flocking to in droves. 

Drenched in sunlight and decorated with clusters of plants, The Kettle Black brought to mind Top Paddock, which only makes sense given that they are part of a string of cafes opened by the same group of blokes. Follow the lineage back further, and you’ll come across Two Birds One Stone, and eventually Three Bags Full, though it underwent a change of ownership a few years back. 

Whilst it’s the youngest, The Kettle Black is the most refined sibling of them all. There is nothing predictable about the brunch menu (though the famous Top Paddock Hotcakes makes an appearance), and each item read like a short, tantalising poem. Despite the sophistication however, brunch here is anything but stuffy, and diners are left in peace with their coffee and paper to soak up the sun. 

Flat White ($4)

Having finally convinced K to get into coffee, we had a Flat White ($4) each, and enjoyed teasing out the various aromas in the brew, guided by the page of tasting notes. 

Flat White ($4)

My cup of coffee was pleasingly strong, with overarching tones of toffee and cocoa. Once the coffee cooled a little, I could just pick out the more delicate notes of floral and stone fruit. I could definitely get used to having tasting notes with my coffee. 

Benedict Styled Eggs with Free Range Pork Shoulder and Aerated Hollandaise ($17) 

I had a game plan – K and I will each pick 3 dishes we want to try, and then pray that 2 of them overlap. That failed miserably as we had no mutual dishes on the first try, but we did agree that the Benedict Styled Eggs with Free Range Pork Shoulder and Aerated Hollandaise ($17) sounded like the bee’s knees. 

Benedict Styled Eggs with Free Range Pork Shoulder and Aerated Hollandaise ($17) 

It certainly was an elegant variation of the traditional breakfast, the moist pulled pork flavoured warmly with cumin and spices. The poached eggs were perfect, and the tangy hollandaise was indeed extra light and fluffy as promised. My only complaint was that the toast succumbed to the common pitfall of being WAY too tough, and whilst I can forgive that in light of the gooey eggs and tender pork, it does not an enjoyable experience make.

Hotcakes with House-Made Ricotta, Blueberries, Pure Maple, Double Cream and Seeds ($18)

It wasn’t too hard to convince K that he would like to try the Hotcakes with House-Made Ricotta, Blueberries, Pure Maple, Double Cream and Seeds ($18), especially after showing him a picture of it online. And it turned out to be even more beautiful than I had anticipated; the thick pancake sat at the bottom of a shallow bowl, garnished with a lush array of summer berries and flowers. The sprinkling of lavender sugar on the cream was as pretty as fairy dust. 

Hotcakes with House-Made Ricotta, Blueberries, Pure Maple, Double Cream and Seeds ($18)

The hotcakes themselves were warm and fluffy, soaked in a deluge of sticky maple syrup and topped with a smear of thick, cool cream. The rich sweetness contrasted marvellously with the tart and juicy berries, and texture came in the form of scattered nuts. Each bite was a work of art, and I couldn’t keep the smile off my face as I ate.

It’s really not very hard to like The Kettle Black, given its beautiful food in a beautiful surrounding at a reasonable price, and the excellent coffee topping it off. However I think Top Paddock will still stay as my favourite brunch place for the time being; when I think of brunch, I think of simple and indulgent meals, and whilst there’s nothing wrong with the more high-brow version at The Kettle Black, I guess I’m still a little old-fashioned at heart.

Rating: 14.5/20 – pot to kettle.

This rating reflects my personal experience at the time of visit.  

Mr Loys Puff

452 City Rd 

South Melbourne, VIC 3205

http://www.mrloyspuff.com.au/

When I travelled to Malaysia and Singapore two summers back, I spent every available moment stuffing my face with the delicacies on offer. Whilst it didn’t take too long for my stomach to rebel against the never-ending litany of food, I had enough time to eat up all of my favourites – Hainanese chicken rice, fried kweh teow, roti soaked in curry sauce, steaming hot bowls of laksa. But what left me with the deepest impression was a heavenly curry puff I had from a street side vender, the flaky pastry stuffed full of spiced lamb chunks and fluffy potato.  I’ve yet to find an equivalent in Melbourne, but Mr Loys Puff seemed as good of a place to start as any. 

Freshly opened in South Melbourne, this hole-in-the-wall restaurant is here to provide a taste of authentic Singapore street food to the homesick and the hungry. The idea here is fast and simple, the menu whittled down to a selection of classics, and two types of curry puffs.

Traditional Curry Puff ($2ea)

Black Pepper Chicken Puff ($2ea)

We started off with one of each type of curry puff – a Traditional Curry Puff ($2ea), and a Black Pepper Chicken Puff ($2ea) – and the nostalgic drink of chyrsanthemum tea in a can.  The pastry was crumbly and buttery, hand-folded around a rich filling of curry chicken, egg, and potato. The black pepper chicken puff had a similarly chunky and satisfying centre, but the spiced curry sauce was swapped for mellow black pepper gravy. 

Nasi Lemak ($8.5)

I’ll be up front and say that I normally don’t like Nasi Lemak ($8.5); I’ve always found the individual elements on the plate to be much too noncohesive, and I end up feeling like I’ve eaten less than the sum of all the parts. So it was with delighted surprise that I found myself greatly enjoying playing mix and match with crackling anchovies, roasted peanuts, and an absurdly crunchy chicken cutlet dipped in scorching sambal. I daresay what held it all together was the sweet fragrance of coconut in the rice, so often disappointingly absent. 

Hainanese Chicken Rice ($7.8, regular)

Hainanese Chicken on Rice ($7.8, regular) on the other hand is a stalwart favourite of mine. The dark mound of rice was flavoured satisfyingly with a gingery chicken stock, served with tender poached chicken and tangy chilli sauce. The chicken soup on the side was lovingly sweetened with scallions and carrots, and I noticed a distinct absence of MSG. The dish could’ve done with a more generous portion of chicken, as what we had was quite skin-heavy, but it was also a fraction of the cost of what you would expect to pay. 

Banana and Chocolate Puff ($2ea)

There’s no dessert on the menu as of yet, but keep your eye out for the Banana and Chocolate Puff ($2ea), a work in progress that we were lucky enough to sample. The buttery pastry and fluffy chunks of banana were already delicious as they were, but the best bit was when we hit upon a pocket of molten chocolate. Chris and I both agreed with our host that, with just a little (or a lot) more chocolate, this would be a devastating dessert.

Mr Loys Puff is unfortunately a bit out of the way for me for a day to day visit, but the food reminded me a lot of what I got to chow down on my holiday. But for those who work and live in the area, Mr Loys Puff is a tasty and reliable option, good for a snack or a meal any time of the day.

Rating: 13/20 – nostalgia puffs.

This rating reflects my personal experience at the time of visit

Sweet and Sour Fork dined as a guest of Mr Loys Puff 

Chez Dre

285-287 Coventry St (rear)
South Melbourne, VIC 
chezdre.com.au

‘Why are all the good cafes in alleyways?’ asked my little sister as we rounded the corner to Chez Dre.  ‘Because we’re in Melbourne, I grunted back, half-asleep.

I’ve kind of been meaning to go to Chez Dre for over a year now, but being car-less, I’ve never really mustered up the determination to trudge my way out there in the early hours. But it’s not every day my younger sister turns 10, so up we got at 9am on a Sunday to make our way to South Melbourne. We were predictably faced with a 25 minute wait when we got there, but it would’ve been significantly shorter if an inconsiderate couple hadn’t pushed their way in front of us, and if outdoor seating was a viable option in the weather. C’est la Vie/First World Problems. 

It was bliss when we were finally seated in the plush green booth, overlooking the shining kitchen and away from the gusts of cold air coming through the door. Watching the hustle and bustle in the kitchen made the wait for food much less agonising; there was a poor girl in there whose only job seemed to be poaching cratefuls of eggs. I really hope she gets paid well for it.

Grand Petit Dejeuner ($19.5)

Grand Petit Dejeuner ($19.5)

My greedy little sister ordered the most lavish item on the menu, the Grand Petit Dejeuner ($19.5). For those of you who didn’t do high school French, that literally translates to ‘big little lunch’, or as we know it, ‘big breakfast’. The items on the plate marched two by two (hurrah, hurrah) – a pair of potato rosti wedges, two perfectly formed eggs, a duo of lamb sausages, and a couple of bacon rashers served with mushrooms, avocado, tomato relish, and sourdough toast. This was a little different from your standard big breakfast offerings, and we enjoyed every single element of the dish. My sister loved the rustic, minted sausages, and I loved swiping the meaty, herbed mushrooms through the runny egg yolks.

Moroccan Baked Eggs ($17.5)

Moroccan Baked Eggs ($17.5)

I had wanted to order the exotic cheese and corn soufflé, but upon seeing that it had been taken off the menu, switched to the Moroccan Baked Eggs ($17.5) instead. I always make the mistake of digging into baked eggs way too quickly and burning my mouth, but this was too good to resist. The yolks were golden and the thick sauce was full of flavour, best scooped up with the crunchy baguette and topped with a slice fatty lamb sausage and a drizzle of cool yoghurt.

But what Chez Dre is really known for is their baked goods and delectable sweets. After pacing back and forth in front of the long glass cabinet, munching on free samples (a fat chocolate éclair, and a wobbly mango dome), we decided on 2 macarons and a cake to share.

Caramel Macaron/Green Tea Macaron ($3ea)

If it’s there, and it always is, I will get the Caramel Macaron ($3). This was great, chewy with a sticky sweet caramel center that had just a hint of salt. The Green Tea Macaron ($3) fared a little less well in my opinion. I would’ve liked a grassy, matcha flavour that this failed to deliver on, and it was a little bit too crumbly. My sister on the other hand loved it, so don’t let me put you off.

Hazelnut Praline Crunch ($8.5)

Passing up the shinier, more extravagant looking confections, we ordered the Hazelnut Praline Crunch ($8.5), reminiscent of Ferrero Rochers. A cube of layered chocolate and hazelnut mousse was supported by a crumbly base, and crowned with a sculpture of praline and biscuit crumbs. We were told by a passing waitress that this was the most popular cake, and we weren’t even remotely surprised. The praline really elevated the dessert to a new level, adding that elusive, slightly sticky crunch to the smooth and light mousse. It’s definitely in the running for dessert of the year.

The hype surrounding Chez Dre is certainly justified, but it has also become a bit of a victim of its own success. Despite quite possibly being the largest cafe in Melbourne, we still had to face a 25 minute wait for tables, plus another 35 minutes for food, and there were only two of us. I personally find that sort of wait to be excessive, no matter how good the nosh may be. I’m not saying don’t go; definitely go, just not on the weekend. Or just pop straight in and out for one of their gourmet baguettes and half a dozen macarons to go.

Rating: 15/20 – happy hogwarts birthday, magic wizard birthday!